The Lonely Jew on Christmas - Performed By Kyle Broflofski With Special Celebrity -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Performed By Kyle Broflofski With Special Celebrity Guest Kyle: It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas. My friends wont let me join in any games. And I cant sing Christmas songs Or decorate a Christmas tree Or leave water out for Rudolph `Cause there's something wrong with me. My people don't believe in Jesus Christ's divinity. I'm a Jew, A lonely Jew On Christmas. Hanukkah is nice but why is it That Santa passes over my house every year? And instead of eating ham I have to eat kosher latkes Instead of Silent Night I'm singing Hoo Hact Toh Gaveesh And what the fuck is up with lighting all these Fucking candles please? I'm a Jew, A lonely Jew I can't be merry `Cause I'm Hebrew On Christmas. Celebrity Guest: Hey little boy I couldn't help but hear Your feeling left out of Christmas cheer And I've come to say that you shouldn't be sad This is the one month you should be glad `Cause its nice to be a Jew on Christmas. You don't have to deal with the season at all. You don't have to be on your best behavior or give to charity. You don't have to have to go to grandma's house with your alcoholic family. Kyle: And I don't have to sit on some fake Santa's lap And have him breath is stinky breath on me. Celebrity Guest: That's right, your a Jew! Kyle: A styling Jew! Together: Its a good time to be Hebrew, On Christmas... Celebrity Guest: On Christmas